Weekly Reflections

An Oasis is a good place to pause and reflect. Each of my weeks provides ample inspiration in terms of topics; from coaching sessions, conversations with family and friends, my own reading, or one of the many podcasts I absorb when on the move. A topic will resonate with me early in the week and I get great pleasure from the iterative process of drafting, revising, polishing, and finalising each essay. Then comes the selection of a suitable photo, usually a product of yet another creative hobby of mine. I invite you take a little time out, to create your own six-minute oasis, find a comfortable chair, and read. You will hopefully find some inspiration from or a degree of identification in these Weekly Reflections. If you do, feel free to subscribe to this section. You will then receive future installments directly by email. Also, feel free to share the link among your circle of friends and associates. Finally, feedback and comments are always most welcome. EnJOY!
Mental Fitness

Entitlement

The second envelope got me curious. There had been several items of post from Corsica since my accident there on holiday in mid-July; invoices, medical records and confirmations of payment, all of which were required in the on-going process of recouping most of my co-payments for the hospital care provided there. That professional treatment for serious spinal injuries may indeed have saved my life; it certainly safeguarded my mobility – the ability to move my arms and legs, without which life would be very different today…

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Transformation

Shame

`What’s that you are drawing there Mary?´

Without pausing or even looking up, Mary replied in her usual chirpy voice:

`I’m drawing a picture of God, MIss.´

`But Mary, nobody knows what God looks like´, enjoined the teacher.

`They will in a minute´, replied the child, looking up beaming…

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Health

Abeyance

It all happened in a matter of seconds. I had been greatly enjoying the great salty swell that sunny day on the west coast of Corsica, bobbing up and down between the 12 ft. waves. This requires successfully negotiating both the entry into the wild surf and, hopefully, a safe exit back onto the beach after the fun. It is all a matter of precise timing. ..

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Mental Fitness

Holidays And Travel

I began to notice things that fascinated me; the insects in Charlottesville, Virginia, were, on average, much larger than their counterparts with which I was familiar. Also snakes, which legend tells us St Patrick drove out of Ireland 1500 years ago, abounded. Or when standing on the south shore of Lake Erie looking north towards Canada, trying to imagine it freezing over in winter, I was overwhelmed by the notion…

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Mental Fitness

Holidays – Holy Days

We’re going on holidays! What excitement this generated in us as children in the 60’s and 70’s! In my case, the experience was extreme because I remember living the 50 weeks in our comparatively dreary home town of Limerick, in anticipation of our two week summer holiday in beautiful Ballycroy, in the Wild West of Ireland.

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Mental Fitness

Pain And Suffering

`Suffering is only letting go of things that don’t work anymore. On the other side of suffering is belief.´ Dan Coyhis, Mohican Writer & CEO Wellbriety Inc. `Pain is an integral part of

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Mental Fitness

The Numinous

The question as to why our culture, in which we were so deeply rooted and steeped, was infected by the punitive, the terrible, and the vengeful to such a extreme degree, is a topic which would go way beyond the scope of this essay, so it may need separate treatment at a later date. The fact was, that, as a young boy, I lived in fear of God. I had been clearly instructed, mainly by teachers in my most tender years – all members of religious orders – that a list of all my sins was being accurately kept and, if I were good, I could make it to heaven, most probably by way of a stint in purgatory, a somewhat lesser form of hell. On the other hand, if I were not good, I was sure to go to hell.

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Mental Fitness

Surrender

All addictive patterns have in common the issue of control; the obsession with establishing, retaining, and losing control. The drinker steps into the pub `for one´ on the way home and finds herself still at the bar at midnight, the family at home long forgotten. The workaholic swears that he will move down a few gears after the current project is handed over, only to wonder, years later, what happened to such resolutions. What is required is the surrender to the impossibility of control. This is a bitter pill to swallow for anybody brought up to `get a grip´ on life and, when things get difficult, to `pull yourself up by your boot straps´.

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Leadership

Responsibility

When growing up as the fifth of ten children, the word `responsibility´ took on a certain meaning for me. My associations included; burden, sacrifice, bondage, criticism, being held to account, judgement, damnation, and other uncomfortable experiences. I decided there and then that, one day, I would be free of all this nonsense…

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Leadership

Taking Things Personally

I first became aware of the Hopi Nation in 1982 when the film Koyaanisqatsi, directed by Godfrey Reggio with music by Philip Glass, hit the big screen. Created between 1975 and 1982, the film is an apocalyptic vision of the collision of two different worlds – urban life and technology versus the environment. There are several meanings to the word `ko.yaa.nis.katsi´ (from the Hopi language). These include; 1. crazy life, 2. life in turmoil, 3. life disintegrating, 4. life out of balance and, 5. a state of life that calls for another way of living.

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Community

Trapped

As long as we are constantly hijacked by our Saboteurs, fear rules our lives and the lives of those around us. This takes place sometimes very obviously, sometimes more subtly. Fear’s toolbox contains a very powerful device that, if not addressed and relinquished, will ensure that the old order will forever rule the day. This device is denial. For many years I stewed in the juice of denial. Sara Bareilles describes the dynamic eloquently in her sublime song “Orpheus“:
Missing the world
The one you knew
The one where everything made sense because you
didn’t know the truth…..

Indeed, many of us didn’t know the truth for long stretches of our lives. Denial has an important role to play in our survival…

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Leadership

Mind The Gap!

My general observations lead me to conclude that we are either in autopilot and react in line with the coping mechanisms and survival strategies we developed before our fourth birthday (approximately) or, having developed sufficient awareness, mindfulness, and mental fitness, we learn to pause before responding to whatever stimuli cross our paths in a conscious, loving manner – beneficial to the healing, growth, and joy of all concerned. The term “autopilot” may be considered charitable. Some would call it “sleepwalking through life” (Dr Allen Berger) or even refer to a “Zombie” existence. And of course, this is not an all-or-nothing phenomenon…

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PQ Mental Fitness

Balance

So, it was really telling when, in a recent yoga lesson, we went though balance exercises which included the Vrikshasana (The Tree Pose, where standing on one foot we bring the other to the inside of our upper thigh), that the terror of childhood – as a felt state – returned. My heart began to race; I began to sweat and couldn’t maintain my balance for longer that twenty seconds. Of even more interest was the fact that my breathing froze. Despite all the insights and, indeed, practice in so many other modalities and situations, here we had the default patterns re-asserting themselves immediately, and with a vengeance…

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