Generational Trauma
For example, the facilitator would ask the client to give a summary of the topic that she hoped to resolve and would then ask her to select, from the participants (many people had never met each other before), people to represent themselves, their mother, father, grandparents, siblings, etc – those people considered to be most relevant to the work at hand. The client didn’t participate actively in the constellation, but rather worked from the side lines in tandem with the facilitator…
Anger
The home in which we grew up did not engender the capabilities or provide a toolset to deal well with emotions. Apparently, anger was a tabu. Ironically, it was also ever-present, mostly in the passive-aggressive manifestations of the wetting of beds, rolling of eyes, and the slamming of doors…
Imagination
Loud voices, cramped spaces, the physical danger of contact sports, tension in the air at home that could be cut through with a bread knife, – these poised challenges to me which were not easily overcome. Fear began to creep into the picture more and more. As Cornnelia Funke has one of her characters state, `fear kills your mind, your heart, and your imagination´. I would add that it also leads us to shut down our vulnerability….
Expansiveness
I am reminded of the image of a group of famished people sitting around a huge cauldron of soup with only spoons of ridiculous length at their disposal. Far longer than a human arm, they make it impossible to feed oneself. Then one person gets the bright idea that they should each feed the person opposite. In this manner an individual problem is solved by means of a collective solution. All are ultimately satiated…
Woodpeckers
Like the woodpecker in the quote above, coaching participants who tap twenty times on a thousand trees may get nowhere but stay busy. Those of us who tap twenty-thousand times on one tree, get dinner. The PQ Programme supports us in staying the course until the benefits of our efforts can be truly experienced. We then find ourselves on the path of cultivating Mental Fitness for life and reap the benefits of improved personal and professional outcomes…
Transference
Carl Gustav Jung, one of the founding figures of depth psychology and psychotherapy, referred to the integration of supressed aspects of our personalities as `Shadow Work´, the idea being that, as we emerge from childhood, we consign those aspects of our history, thinking, and behaviour which we find unpalatable, to the shadows, in the hope that they would somehow be rendered harmless or even disappear…
Christmas
The fire was already burning brightly in the hearth, and, in the heavily curtained bay window, the large, decorated Christmas tree with its baubles, figurines, lights, and shining tinsel provided a further source of warm light for the happy scene. Towards the end of the melee, we found ourselves wading ankle-deep through a kaleidoscopic sea of reams of torn wrapping paper, each child creating their island with the gifts they had gratefully received from various relations, near and far.
Stress
I state the following key principle of Positive Intelligence: All your distress is self-generated. To be more precise, all your distress in the forms of anxiety, disappointments, stress, anger, shame, guilt – all the unpleasant stuff that makes up your suffering – is generated by your own Saboteurs.
Shirzad Chamine, `Positive Intelligence´
Addiction
Over recent months, many people have asked me about the name `SoberOasis´, wanting to know if my coaching services are principally targeted at alcoholics, junkies, and other substance addicts. As the answer is `no´, this essay intends to provide clarity by means of examining the prevalent misconceptions about addiction in our society, and the true meaning of `sobriety´, as I experience and understand it.
Moonage Daydreamer
My life since its turning point in 2003 has brought many dreams to fruition. Climbing mountains which appeared beyond my reach, running marathons along beautiful shores, dancing, singing, and making music, engaging in service all around the world, re-engaging with my beloved family, learning photography and meeting people who inspire and lead by example…
